Monday, December 15, 2008

Oh The Way Words DON'T Come

Words right now don't even work for me anymore. I think it may be that I have had some problems with some stories--not the stories themselves, outside things though have been giving me some problems. And this makes it a little depressing to even try to work on the stories.

I know, I sound like a whiney baby--my goal right now is to finish editing some things for a friend, make some fun banners and maybe some avatars to keep my mind off things--and get excited for things as well, and then maybe add some words to my stories.

But as for writing--somehow I am getting this gut feeling inside of me to write a screenplay. It would be a romantic comedy, but I have no idea how to write a screenplay. I wrote this one act play in my college intro to theater class about a year ago--it was a comedy, but alas, a lot of people didn't find it believable. For right now though, I know I really don't write good dialogue--I'm great with description, but I know my dialogue is dull and dry, there never seems to be enough emotion-for me-to immerse the reader's attention fully into the story. I think my best bet would be to try and write a some plays, teleplays, screenplays, whatever--as long as it helps my dialogue.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

National Novel Writing Month

The world has stopped revolving around this time of the year. Thank goodness it is over.

In my experience with National Novel Writing Month, I have learned that perseverance is one of the biggest keys to success for completing the great feat of reaching 50,000 words in 30 days.

My main problem this year happened that my main character I had originally began to write changed my story and how the story should be written. That would have constituted in a complete erase and start over on my behalf. Other than trying to map out the story again on such little time, I started a brand new story. I began a story that has lived inside the back of my conscience.

My first story I tried, I got a total word count of around 10,000 words. I was off to a good start, but then the story died and needed to be changed.
The second story I started and wrote as well, I came to a total word count of 16,023 words. Then sadly, that story and the characters needed a break as well.

So, along with the previous post, I will still work on my first novel I have finished writing. That one will be the one I can hopefully publish one day. I'm hoping to get a lot of writing done over Christmas break.

I will, however, participate willingly in the National Novel Writing Month for next year. I do not have a story, but will start thinking of one around October. Hopefully I will get my butt in gear and write like I need to live on it next November.

P.S. For those of you who are waiting for the third piece of the Supernatural fanfic I started, I will be starting that up again. It's a storyline that has been bothering me for a long time.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Rewriting, Rewording, Recycling

National Novel Writing Month bombed on me again this year. I know there are two weeks left, but I have lost my story. The characters just don't want it to go any further at the moment. I had started one story just to have that stop and then started one other story just to have that stop as well. Ka-Blam! Writer's Block. I did get 10k written though! 4k more than I did last year! YAY!

Luckily, I am breaking down the walls of that block and decided to rewrite my very first manuscript. I'm adding more chapters, more plotlinse and completely re-outlining the story. I believe it will bring out more of my characters personalities and show the storyline in a better light.

So, I'm working on that re-outline, and have decided to also just outline the rest of my story ideas. I'm no good at outlining, but I'm going to just get all these outlines done and out of the way. That way, I can write my stories.

And so with my rewriting and outlining, I will be able to go out and reword things and recycle my favorite scenes into the newer version. It's going to be a lot of work, but I'm glad that I have a group that cheers me on. Thanks WD peeps! You know who you are!

Off for the day, hopefully I can update it more often now that I've quit Nano.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Okay.

Alrighty then!

I am on a short vacation in California. I'm hoping to get some time to work on some story outlines. Especially that one story I have for National Novel Writing Month. If you like to write, try it. It's an amazing release for your mind and a great challenge that no matter how much you write, you are proud of yourself. The goal for every NaNo participant is 50,000 words in 30 days. That's a lot. I have recruited some people. Last year I participated and I got 6,000 words done. I am still extremely proud of how much I got done especially with how busy I was last year with everything else in my life. This year though, I WILL make the 1667 words per day goal to get my 50,000! I WILL I WILL! So, sign up on www.nanowrimo.org if you want to participate in it and try. It's so exhilirating!

Also, really really really come to this masquerade ball on the 24th. All you Utah people COME! It's a great magnificent cause to support our troops. You don't have to support the war in order to appreciate what these men and women have put forth to help our country. It'll be awesome!

And, check out www.loveitlikeithateit.com. That's my friends review site and it's amazing. :)

Anywho, since I'm on vacation, I will try to get Part 3 of my Supernatural Fanfic up and going again soon and get it done by Halloween so you can have a treat of how I perceive the show and the Winchester boys! :D

CIAO!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Fall Fantasy Masquerade Ball

You may have noticed my little flyer at the top of this blog. It's for the Fall Fantasy Masquerade Ball on October 24th in West Valley, Utah.

Just give it a click for more information and come! It's a benefit ball for the USO-United Services Organization.

And I will continue with my Supernatural Fanfic next time. :)

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Part Two

Keepers Part Two:


The music blared as the Winchesters drove to Addison, Illinois. The breeze blew through the open windows as Dean sang over the music.

"Shot through the heart, and you're to blame! You give love a bad name!"

Sam watched Dean nervously. "Uh, Dean," he began, "what's the occasion?" He leaned over to turn the music down as soon as he realized that Dean wasn't hearing him.

"Hey dude, what'd you do that for? I was getting into my own mojo!" Dean actually looked more confused than angry at Sam.

"What's up with you Dean? Ever since you've come back from hell, you've been all...well, you've been weird." Sam raised his eyebrows at Dean who just looked taken back by what his little brother just told him.

"I'm always weird Sammy. When did you finally notice?" Dean shot back with a twinge of sarcasm within his tone. Enough that Sam noticed and couldn't help but smile a little.

"Yeah, well, the last time you listened to Bon Jovi in this car, you said it was because of the occasion. So, is this an occasion or something?"

"Kind of. It mostly deals with the next job." Dean grinned wildly thinking about the job he secretly found whilst Sam decided to sneak off to places with who knows these days. Sam stared blankly at Dean apparently waiting for some kind of description on the job. Dean sighed. "The job is in Addison, Illinois."

"I got that much, but why the love music? Or should I say hate love music?" Sam replied.

"I think we're dealing with a succubus of some kind." Dean watched the road more at this point since the weather decided to change and pour rain on them as they travelled.

"A succubus?" Sam questioned curiously. "Why do you think a succubus? You mean the demon who drains a mans life after seducing them?"

"That's the one. Now shut your piehole unless you have something actually useful to add." Dean then turned the music back up and continued to sing off key with it. The tires of the Impala splashed as it drove through the rain that pounded off the pavement and took the brothers closer to their destination.

Supernatural Fanfic Part One

Okay, I am giving into "not" writing fanfics, but this idea was too good to put away in the closet.

Keepers Part One:

Her feet pounded the wet ground softly yet in a rapid pace. Heart racing and breathing quickly the Adidas running shoes made her feel like she could fly anywhere. Climbing the steps of the Victorian style home in Illinois, the wooden porch steps squeaked and groaned. Taking a final count of her heartbeat, she put in her key into the white painted door and clicked open the lock.
"I'm home Mom," she yelled as she stepped into the front entry. She heard no answer from her mom, but knew she was present in the house.
Quickly running up the stairs to the bathroom, she dressed down and climbed into the shower to cool down and clean up from her run.
A small, rippled window right above the shower head glowed a slight orange from the rising moon.
She stepped into the shower, warm droplets of water relaxed her tense muscles and slowed her heart rate as she breathed slower.
Running her fingers through her long, wet brown hair, she heard a rustle outside the dark blue and white striped shower curtain.
"Just a breeze from the vent," she told herself outloud. Shrugging it all off, she continued to wash herself.
A few moments later, a loud ominous sounding thud came from the side of the tub making the ceramic vibrate. Slowly, she peeked around the curtain to find a young man in his twenties, short blond hair and a slight show of not shaving for a few days stood before her. She kept her eyes locked on the young man as she leaned backwards to her homemade bath salts. Grabbing a handful, the young man spoke.
"I'm so sorry Johanna." His image flickered as if he were a dying lightbulb, then he disappeared. Not letting go of the salts in her hand, she turned back to the shower and underneath the shower head of pouring water, there the young man stood once more. "I'm so sorry Johanna," he said once more.
"Damn you Kale," she told him and threw the salt at the spirit in her shower. The young man's spirit disappeared for the time being. "I could have sworn I salted and burned his bones just last week!" Frustrated, she finished her shower quickly, and upon climbing to her bed checked her shotgun to make sure it had salt shots and went to sleep.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Despite Everything...

Despite everything
Everyone says
About your creation
It still brings joy
To some.

Despite everything
Every crimson rose
Has it's sharp thorns.
It's beauty still brings
Some happiness.

Despite everything
The world does
Fights for a reason
Though some bring
Horrible damage.

Despite everything
The words may hurt
Hearts will break
But you will still
Bring brilliance.

Despite everything
You have inspired
So many people
To dream on
And accomplish.

Despite everything
Pleasure brings pain
Love brings hurt
Happiness brings sadness
Into life.

Despite everything
You have not let
Me down today and
Not tomorrow.
Despite everything.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Climbing the Ladder of Writing...Once Again

There's this song that I have been listening to because it really fits the feeling overall of my paranormal romance that I've been working on for almost a year now. Albeit, I was finishing my first vampire story, but this ghost story is my extreme love and baby now. I share tidbits here and there but I don't give away the ending.

But to refer to the song that has kept me going with this story lately is "Say Goodbye" by Skillet. Now I like ballads but this one I LOVE. It really fits the mood for my main character, Emma throughout the story once she finds something out.

I am glad that this song triggers the story into play. I know what happens and I can see snippets of scenes that I'm working on as I go. The horseback rides with Jon, and the special conversations and walks with Sam. Even the moments with Emily that make Emma and Emily more like sisters than strangers.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Everything is Going Downhill.

This past month has been horrid in my writing department! I have written a bit more to my ghost story, but not much. I have to read A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens to apparently understand my story more. I know there's going to be a reference in there somewhere, I just don't know where yet.

On the other hand, at least my characters have been chatty. Emi isn't so much right now because she still ticked about some things that have happened to her in the second chapter of her story. Emma is happy that I'm focusing more on her story right now to get it finished, albeit, Jon from Emma's story won't let me write anything until I finish that book I mentioned before. Cat from my first vampire story is taking a break for me. Which is awesome because I don't think I could handle working on her sequel at the moment. I had to break out of the vampire scene and I love writing my ghost story.

And everyone must watch Supernatural on September 18th! It's going to be so freaking awesome! And I just found out that MGM/Sci-Fi are making a Stargate: Atlantis movie! Woohoo! Although, this season they are now showing, Season 5, is the last for the Atlantis expedition. :( However, the new series, Stargate: Universe is a go for the Stargate franchise! I'm so excited! At least I won't live without any Stargate for long. Then when it's all over, I will just have to stick with watching my seasons on DVD.

So, sorry about not writing and catching up here. I've got work full-time now and it's so stressful that I cannot be on the computer at home as much. I take more naps though. :) Ciao! At least tomorrow is a holiday.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Tonight is the Night!

Tonight is the exciting night for the Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer release. Where we find out if Bella is changed into a vampire or not. I'm sad that it is the final book in the Twilight Saga, but I am happy that it is coming to some kind of closure.

Now, you may have noticed that I've removed two things from my blog. The widgets that countdown to the release of Breaking Dawn and the quote of the day one. I'm doing this because the book comes out tonight at midnight!

Well, my writing is so-so lately. I do have two chapters finally outlined better for one of my vampire novels and my ghost story has a potential sequel but I'm not quite sure if I am going to give in to that character and tell her she can have a sequel. I love her story of forever love and don't want to ruin it. Uh, yeah, writing will all be brought back up to speed once I finish reading Breaking Dawn. Stephenie Meyer's writing style really inspires me and my stories. I literally use the Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, and The Host books as references when I get stuck. You think that's sad? Well, I don't. I think it's perfectly sane. Every writer has their book that they could call their "bible for writing". I believe that since Twilight helped me find my writing style, it is my "bible for writing". Well, I must be off lots of partying tonight! YAY! CIAO!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Wow!

Woah...wow. I can't say enough about the new Twilight teaser trailer. It's absolutely amazing! I am putting it on here for a bit until the next trailer is released. :)


And with writing, my writing, it's all good. It will be on a break next week while I attend Comic Con! Ciao!

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Hello.

Hello my friends.

I've just gotten kicked back into gear for writing. I'm so excited about this new story, EXTINCTION, it's not even funny. I so can't wait until it's finished.

And I'm rereading my finished story WITHOUT a red pen! It's hard not to edit it as I read, but it's helping me find where things need to be added, revised, and edited out. Thanks to a friend for helping me figure out that that is what I needed to do so I can get over the frustration of it all. Hopefully after this, I can edit it faster. :)

Well, I am off. Ciao!

Friday, July 4, 2008

Independence Day

Happy 4th of July! Be safe everyone and have fun!

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Extinction

Okay, new story has begun. Now it makes it that I am working on writing four stories and editing one other. Crazy characters all wanting a piece of my brain to spill the story on to the page.

This new story is called, EXTINCTION. Here is my summary for it.

Emi has the crappiest job, the crappiest apartment and she’s been kicked out of college. Her life is pretty much over in her eyes, but when she meets Nathan, he tells her he needs her help. His kind is going extinct. The only problem is that he is a vampire and the humans are killing them off faster than he can count. However, after escaping some near death experiences involving both vampire and human, Emi realizes that she must be someone important to bringing peace between the everyone. She only wonders how she is going to make that happen.

Let me know what you think. It is another story from a dream. I love this idea though and Emi is becoming to be my most rebellious character. I love her right now!

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Sad Songs.

Okay well, a lot of writers use music to write. Some like classical music because lyrics can distract them, and others like me like to use songs with lyrics in them. Sad songs help out a lot.

Here is a list of sad songs that help out with a lot of very sad scenes. I have used a lot of these before for my own writing.

1. Minnie Driver--Hungry Heart
2. Faith Hill--Let Me Let Go, Like We Never Loved At All, It Matters To Me, Cry
3. Guns 'N Roses--November Rain
4. Mandy Moore--Want You Back, Cry, I Wanna Be With You
5. Maroon 5--Better That We Break
6. Jekyll and Hyde Soundtrack--Once Upon A Dream
7. Jimmy Eat World--My Sundown, Here You Me
8. Josh Groban--To Where You Are, Home To Stay, Broken Vow, Remember When It Rained, Caruso, She's Out Of My Life, For Always Forever, With You, My December
9. Les Miserables Soundtrack--A Little Fall Of Rain
10. Matchbox 20--If You Are Gone
11. Moulin Rouge Soundtrack--Come What May (a really good love song, but it is still a sad song)
12. Nickel Creek--The Hand Song
13. Dido--Here With Me
14. Rent Soundtrack--Without You
15. LeAnn Rimes--Insensitive, Please Remember: Coyote Ugly Soundtrack
16. Sarah Brightman--Here With Me, Let It Rain
17. Bryan Adams--Do I Have To Say The Words?, Straight From The Heart, Please Forgive Me
18. Taylor Swift--Teardrops On My Guitar, Cold As You
19. Avril Lavigne--When You're Gone, Slipped Away
20. Loreena McKennit--The Highway Man
21. Within Temptation--Forgiven
22. BBMak from The Princess Diaries--Miss You More
23. Carrie Underwood--Starts With Goodbye, Just A Dream, I Know You Won't
24. Michelle Branch--Goodbye To You
25. U2--With Or Without You
26. Linkin Park--My December, Shadow Of The Day
27. 3 Doors Down--Let Me Be Myself, Pages, When I'm Gone, Here Without You
28. Saliva--Rest In Pieces
29. Celine Dion--Goodbye's (The Saddest Word)
30. Coldplay--The Scientist
31. Secondhand Serenade--Like A Knife, Goodbye
32. Muse--Sing For Absolution
33. Aida Soundtrack (The musical, not the Opera)--Written In The Stars, A Step Too Far, Elaborate Lives, Enchantment Passing Through
34. August Rush Soundtrack--This Time, Something Inside
35. Michael Buble--Lost
36. Daughtry--Over You
37. Enchanted Soundtrack--So Close
38. Backstreet Boys--Incomplete
39. Evanescence--My Immortal
40. Switchfoot--Dare You To Move
41. Garth Brooks--The Dance, It Was Your Song
42. Goo Goo Dolls--Iris
43. Depeche Mode--Precious
44. Nickelback--Someday, Far Away
45. Lifehouse--Broken
46. Gavin Degraw--We Belong Together
47. Kate Winslet--What If
48. P.S. I Love You Soundtrack--Love You Til The End (yes, it is a romantic song, but if you have seen the movie, this song makes you cry!), More Time, Everything We Had

Monday, June 23, 2008

Work.

The air is stale. No one has moved through the office for a while now. My head is beginning to feel like it’s been run over by a truck. My eyes keep watching thoroughly for any movement to come about in the area, but all they register are the fluorescent lights above glowing menacingly as the minutes tick on for the day.
Any office atmosphere may usually be quiet if it is a doctor’s office or a dentist’s office. However, since school let out, the silence in this office is awkward and unusual. There happen to be some people coming in and out, working on their schedules or sitting on the cool maroon leather couches waiting for their turn. Still, the unbearable feel of nothing sits in the back of my brain as the front of my head just pounds endlessly. I take a sip of the water from the bottle on my desk in hopes that it will help the aches going on throughout my mind. Only a quarter of the lunch I had still sits in its plastic container cooling down after not taking a bite for minutes. Yes, the phone will occasionally ring, and students will trail through, but it’s been silent for the longest period of all today.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

The Playlist

Okay, so you may be wondering why does she have all this music on this playlist? Well, first of all...I love all this music. Second, it's all the bands, and singers that I listen to while writing my stories. The lyrics in each song are inspirational, the tone of the music itself is inspiring, etc. I used So She Dances by Josh Groban for a romantic scene in one story and it turned out to be such an amazing part of my story. I loved it.

I'm also not going to be doing much for the next day or two. I'm going to be in the midst of a major organizational period of my apartment cleaning. I have to sort through clothes, toys and movies, I have to put up shelves, clean out storage, and do all the normal chores too. Which I better get going. Ciao!

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

More updates.

There are a couple more updates! I now have the Twilight movie widget for the countdown until 12-12-08 and also my widget for a playlist. I hope you really enjoy the mix. I'll be updating more later. I really should go to sleep now.

Updates

Okay, so those of you who see my blog and actually read it. I am working on updating some things on here. I'm trying to add some things so that you can listen to music, see my favorite books, and what I am reading right now--same with movies.

So, my first update, vwa-la (sorry--have no idea how to spell that). But you can now see my Breaking Dawn countdown going on. It will disappear the day after the book comes out. I hope that you enjoy it. I'm totally excited about it. You'll probably see a countdown for the movie as well some time soon.

Also, editing is horrible. I hate it! I am rewriting the first 3-4 chapters and am still working on chapter 1. I do like my rewrite more though...I could tell that I had really good stuff from the first draft, but I love my second draft so far and can tell that the story will be much better just from this. And I am still working on the outline for the second book. My characters won't tell me anything about it for now. It seems to be a really big secret.

Ciao!

Monday, June 16, 2008

Happy Happy Birthday!


Tomorrow is Alexis' third birthday. My precious little baby girl isn't a baby anymore and growing up. She's too darn cute...I try to get her to say that once in a while. Well, okay, at least once a day. Alexis is just this active cutie that loves to play outside and swim. She is a regular fish out of water. She also loves to read and gets excited to go the library. I need to start working with her more on her letters and sounds so that she can be reading right into preschool. Well, that's my hope, but that's a hope of a parent.


But anyway,


HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEXIS!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Accomplishment

Today I had one of my main character's, Emma, from Lovely Dreams, show me two incredibly depressing and sad scenes from her story. I wrote them down making it close to 4,000 words for just two scenes.

I feel so accomplished at getting through these scenes because 1) they were incredibly difficult emotionally to write and 2) I didn't flood the keyboard! I was afraid that because I'm an incredibly emotional person that I would do that second one more.

I do have to say thanks to all those in my writing group at the WD though. If it weren't for them tonight, I wouldn't have gotten through these scenes very well. I would have been a complete and crazy mess! So, you all know who you are...keep it up!

Anyway, so now this story basically has the ending written and since I've got this love triangle in the story, I find now that there is a happy ending for my Emma. Much happier than the original ending. Now my epilogue is going to change, but that's okay. I'm so happy!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Dreams

So, Twilight was a dream by Stephenie Meyer. Well, in the past three weeks, I have had two dreams that have plots or something really cool about them.

The first one was a sci-fi story about robots. Almost a mix between, The Stepford Wives, The Host and The Body-Snatchers kind of thing.

The second one is about vampires going extinct. This dream happened last night. I absolutely cannot get the images out of my mind. I will begin writing this one down today. I've already started on the other one's story, but this one is now going to take precendence because a) it's cooler, and b) it has a better plot line going for it.

Anyway, off to the library I go and I hope everyone has a wonderful day! Ciao!

Saturday, June 7, 2008

Back now...

I have now returned from my adventurous vacation to Yosemite National Park in California. My husband kicked a bear in the middle of the night yelling like a madman, and I got bit by a mosquito which caused a very large allergic reaction swelling my eye shut and then the next day got pooped on by a bird. It was pretty adventurous.

Anyway, this is short today. I'm going to go finish unpacking and putting things away. Then I'm going to relax with a movie and some Reese's Pieces I got at the store today. Ciao!

Saturday, May 31, 2008

Writer's Weekend...

So, my writing group has what we call, a "Writer's Weekend" where we don't post anything anywhere and we just write like mad. There won't be any new posts this whole weekend and for the first week of June because I'll be on a camping trip. However, I will be writing and editing like mad.

I hope that you all have a wonderful first week of summer! I will be back most likely on Saturday the 7th with some good news.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Starting Anew

So, today, I decided to say a little about my next book, The Shadow of the Moon.

Here's a little summary about it:

Back in her home town after her emotional travel through Florence, Italy; Catherine now has to start working toward finding a loophole through the rules that Antonio placed on the Guardians and Protectors over 600 years ago. This is all in order to be able to be with Carson once and for all without any others breathing down their backs about their relationship with one another. Although, Catherine feels like she has no blood relatives left, she finds out a major secret that her mom and one of the Guardian vampires had never meant to reveal.

I hope that summary was good. I have now started the outline and the first chapter for this story. It's probably one of my favorites so far as well.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

IT'S FINISHED!

The Sunset Heir is finished! 1 year ago in June, I got the idea and set my mind to work on writing this story. It has evolved into my little baby and I am so excited that it is finished. 17 chapters + an epilogue, 241 pages long and 73, 295 words. I cannot believe I finished something so big!

Now I must dig out that inner editor/critic and unleash them on my story. I will also be starting the second book to the trilogy. So, if I don't post anything for a while, I may be writing or just plain busy.

I also got a new position at work. I'm now the receptionist in the counseling office. It will be hard work, but a great experience as well.

Ciao!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

The Final Question From The Stephenie Meyer Q & A At Thanksgiving Point

Here it is everyone...the final question that is my favorite since I am a writer. I'm really thankful that was able to meet Stephenie Meyer and to just be able to listen to the answer to this question, made me feel more of a writer myself. I'm trying to do some of the things in this answer already in order to make my writing better.

Oh and really quick news on my writing...I am now working on my outline for my story, Lovely Dreams, and the outline for the second book that follows The Sunset Heir which is tentatively called, The Shadow of the Moon. I'm really excited about these new projects and without a doubt excited to go back through The Sunset Heir and get some editing done on it.

So, back to Stephenie Meyer!

15. Just to finish up, I get a lot of questions about being a writer. How do I get my books published? How should I go about this and that? And this is sort of my normal spiel; this is what I tell people who want to write.
Write. Don’t worry about any of that other stuff. Because it really doesn’t matter. If you’re not writing for the experience of writing, the rest of it is not going to be worth it. Because it’s actually, I know some people think it’s kind of glamorous and everything—it’s really not. In fact, we were in Texas and some girls got in trouble with the police because they were hanging out of their car. They had seen this white limo and they figured I was in it. It’s like, No, I don’t roll in limos, sorry. There’s a lot of hard work involved in being a writer and there is a lot of sacrifice and that’s not the good part. The good part is the writing. So if you’re not, if it’s not enough for you to be able to sit down and just write the story for yourself, then maybe that’s not the right way to go. If it is, and you love it and you love those characters and you want to share them with other people, wait until you’re done. Finish the book. Write it for yourself and never second guess and think, “What will someone else think about this? Is it appropriate for this audience? Or should I write for a different audience?” Don’t think about any audience but you. Finish the book and then when you’re all done, get online because there are a million resources out there. Do the research; follow the rules because agents hate it when you get cutesy with your letters. Just send them what they want. There’s a really great website called, Writer’s Market Online and that will give you all kinds of information, but my main advice is wait until you’re done. And enjoy the writing because I would still do this even if nobody here had ever read any one of my books and no one was going to. Because to me, writing the stories is just sure joy that it really doesn’t matter that anybody else enjoys it. But I’m really glad you are here, and have read my books. And it really does make it magic to know that my characters don’t just live in here (Stephenie’s mind) but in everyone else’s heads too. That makes them so real for me, it’s really cool.

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Yet, More Questions!

Now, after these four questions, there will be one final one from the Stephenie Meyer discussion/signing. I saved the final one for last because it is my favorite answer for me being a writer. I'll post more on it later...enjoy these questions and answers!


11. Due to the success of your career, what is the biggest sacrifice you’ve had to make and is it worth it?
There’s kind of two things, one of them that I think is like the daily sacrifice. I used to read three or four books a week. Every week. Reading is a huge part of who I was, and I can’t do that as much now. And it’s crazy, I feel like—Wow, how many books did I read this year? Ten so far? For me, that’s really weird. I miss reading, but it’s worth the sacrifice there because writing is just way better than reading. It’s amazing, it’s my favorite thing.
The other big sacrifice is time and there are things that aren’t exactly worth it. You know I’m missing some graduations this week. And that’s kind of hard. Being away from my kids is a really big sacrifice for me. I don’t think they mind as much, you know I get home and they’re like, “Oh Mom, you were gone?” So, you know, boys. We’re going to have a big party when I get home. My husband is DVD’ing everything for me and we’re going to eat popcorn and watch Kindergarten graduation and all that good stuff when I get back.

12. What’s it like to be in Time magazine for the “Top 100 Most Influential People”?
I don’t think I even have an answer to that. I don’t know. It’s too weird, it’s surreal, I don’t believe it entirely. I have a couple copies of the magazine, and that’s my picture there right next to Oprah. And I still don’t believe it, but I mean, it’s so cool and I’m so glad this year Time decided to put everyone on the cover. So I can say, “Hey, I was on the cover of Time magazine.” That’s probably my favorite part, but you can see the dedication to my fans. Because last week I was in Kansas City doing an event because it had sold out quite a while earlier and when I could have been in New York in the same room with George Clooney and Robert Downey Jr. You know that I was okay with it when I only knew about Clooney. And then the morning of, I was watching The View in my hotel room and Robert Downey Jr. was on, he was talking about going to the party that night. I’m like, “NO! NO!” I emailed my agent, “How do I get to New York?” So, Robert Downey Jr., I miss that.

13. How do you juggle being a mom and a writer?
It’s a constant balance. Because things change. When I first started writing, I had babies on my lap and so, literally juggling. Now my kids are in school all day and it’s a different thing. And so I have to readjust all the time, but the way I manage is I always keep my office—with the houses and different moves we’ve done—in the middle of the living room pretty much. Because I’ve found as long as I can hear my kids, I’m fine. If I can’t hear them, I start to think, “What are they up to?” So I can’t ever close a door. And then I’m lucky to have these kids that are just well balanced and centered and they’re fun and easy going. And so that makes my job so much easier. And I have my husband who’s willing to be a stay at home dad and take care of my kids. Which is so cool for them to have their Dad around all the time. That’s amazing. Yay for good husbands! That helps, you have to have a lot of help, and we have family that helps out. My mom lives down the street and that’s the best thing ever. You can’t do it alone, absolutely not.


14. Is that your face on the cover of the book? If not, whose is it?
I have no idea. It’s some gorgeous model who gets paid to be in pictures. It’s not my job. I get a lot with the other cover too. The way publishing works is they do a cover and show it to you and say, “Here’s your cover. What do you think?” And if you say, “Wow. I hate it.” They say, “Aw, too bad.” Actually that’s not so much the case with me anymore, and with The Host, it was a great experience. They sent me the picture and said, “What do you think of this?” I said, “I love it!” They said, “So do we.” We said, “Yes, we’ve got it done.” That’s not always the case because people ask me about the Twilight covers—and no, those are not my hands on the front cover of Twilight either. Again, that’s a pretty model. So really quickly what the covers mean—
i. The Host is pretty easy.
ii. Twilight is for me, kind of the idea of choice—the fruit of knowledge of good and evil. Not having taken a bit yet, but contemplating.
iii. New Moon is one of those covers they said, “Here’s your cover, what do you think?” I said, “I hate it.” They said, “Too bad.” So that one actually means nothing to me.
iv. Eclipse is one we were able to find some common ground on. For me, it’s sort of trying to cut ties with your old life. Bella thinks she can do that easily with a nice clean cut but it doesn’t work that way, and there are some threads that are harder than others. So that was my depiction, my metaphor for her to try and leave her human life behind.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Four Questions From The Q & A With Stephenie Meyer

7. Why are the souls able to live in a perfect society and the humans failed—aren’t the souls dealing with all the human emotions?
Yes. And if you think about it, all of us have human emotions and some of us try really hard to be good people. We don’t always succeed, but we try. And we would never dream of stealing from anyone or hurting anyone or doing anything bad. Then there are other human beings who have the exact same emotions as us, and they don’t mind strapping a bomb to themselves and blowing up a crowded square. Humans are capable of an amazing range. The souls aren’t the same—they don’t have that range. They really can’t be anything but kind. So they have the emotions, but like those of us who try to be good people, they’re quite able to handle them, and that’s why their society works so much better than ours.

8. On page 218, please say it is not a coincidence; Jeb says he hears a lot of Jims and Pams. Please say it is because you love The Office.
Yes. That was absolutely an Office reference. And I’m really glad people got it.

9. Stephenie darling, how is Ian completely able to look past Melanie’s body and fall in love with the worm in the back of her head?
That was kind of the magic of the story for me. I knew people were going to accept her after a while. But when Ian started to fall in love with her, it made the experience. That’s why I finished the book I think, because I was so intrigued with this character who could do that. Who could care more about what somebody said and did rather than what they looked like or who they were. He was amazing to me and so, he was able to do that because that is who he is as a person. He takes people for what they really are and there aren’t very many people who can do that, that’s why I love him.

10. Will there be a sequel to The Host?
This is one of those probably questions. It’s funny because I’ve been working so much on my other stories and I’ve been editing forever, and just thinking in the Forks world. That’s where I’ve been mentally. And so, in these last couple weeks, answering Host questions and going through the book again and again, I’m starting to get excited about the sequels which are kind of cool. I have outlines; I have the prologue written for the second one and the epilogue written to the third; so I’ve got the frame. And I imagine eventually that I’ll get to that. It might take me a while, so I don’t want to make any guarantees, right now as soon as I get done with this summer, what I want to do is just take a year and just write again. No publicity, none of that, just sit down and write for a whole year. Which sounds like an incredible luxury to me. So, we’ll see which books come out of that time.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

More Questions From The Signing...

4. You write intense falling in love experiences. Where/who did you get your inspiration from? Do you believe people can experience the love you describe in your stories or is it fantasy to you?
Uh, I don’t think you’re going to like the answer to this question, but I could not have written these stories before I had my children. They were my first experience with the kind of love that absolutely without question I would give my life for. You know I had different boys that I fell in love with off and on, but I always had a really firm grip on reality. But with my kids, I didn’t anymore. And that was really my experience with not the kind of romantic love, but to be able to understand the intensity and the way you do things that are insane and dangerous for somebody. That was when I kind of learned how it feels like that.

5. At what point did Doc start seeing Wanderer as a person and how did that change his outlook?
I can’t say an exact part in the book when that happens, but I think all of the humans living in the caves get used to her after a while—as you get used to anything. And once you stop looking at someone as an enemy, and you start noticing the really good things that they do—especially since Wanda does a lot of really good things, it’s hard not to look at her as a person. Also, Doc is just a very compassionate person. It doesn’t bring him any joy to hurt anyone, and so he always thinks of her very kindly and would never be the one to do anything nasty to her as much as she was afraid of that. So, Doc is on of the easier cases.

6. Why did you make Jared so mean? I was bothered that he hit her “Wanderer” over and over again. (Steph: He only hit her the one time.) Why were Sharon and Maggie so bitter towards Wanda?
Here’s the thing—because I wrote the story from the alien’s perspective, I think everyone’s looking at it from that side and saying, “But Wanda means no harm. She’s this wonderful, kind person who would never hurt them, how can they be this way?” And I think what you need to do as you’re trying to understand them, is think of the scariest movie you’ve ever seen with a really scary monster—something that kept you up at night. And then imagine that the whole world is filled with that monster and you’re all by yourself with all the rest of them out there, and that you live in horror and fear every single day. And that’s a really hard thing to think about, it’s on thing to say the words—but to imagine it is something else. Then imagine that that monster is in your power and that you finally have a group of people who are on your side and one of them comes to you, how would you feel towards them? This person has taken away everything from you. This is your worst enemy in the world. I’m surprised that so many people can understand Wanderer because it doesn’t make sense from a human perspective to think kindly of her at all. And Jared in particular, think of the person you love most in the whole world and imagine if someone took them from you and they came back with their face. You know how you would feel towards that person. That he’s able to overlook who she is; is an amazing thing to me. It was interesting writing his character because originally I had only planned for him to be the only love interest in the story. But he was very inflexible, and it made sense for his character. When I write, the one thing I can’t do is make my characters say something or do something that isn’t part of who they are. And so I couldn’t make him be something he wasn’t. Ian, on the other hand, he wasn’t supposed to have a part. He barely had a name. But from the first time he opened his mouth to ask Jeb, “What are you thinking? Why are you doing this?” That sense of him wanting to know more and being willing to listen to the answer, sort of leaped into his character and by the time he had his first conversation with Jared, it was over. I was already sold. So, he really came in and changed the story and made it an ending that I enjoyed a lot more.inflexible, and it made sense for his character. When I write, the one thing I can’t do is make my characters say something or do something that isn’t part of who they are. And so I couldn’t make him be something he wasn’t. Ian, on the other hand, he wasn’t supposed to have a part. He barely had a name. But from the first time he opened his mouth to ask Jeb, “What are you thinking? Why are you doing this?” That sense of him wanting to know more and being willing to listen to the answer, sort of leaped into his character and by the time he had his first conversation with Jared, it was over. I was already sold. So, he really came in and changed the story and made it an ending that I enjoyed a lot more.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Here It Begins...

Okay then. My videos were all crap, but I finally got the transcription of questions and answers from the Stephenie Meyer discussion/signing at Thanksgiving Point on the 16th. I'll go ahead and post two to three questions a day because it is five pages single-spaced on my Word document. WARNING! If you have NOT read, The Host, there are slight spoilers in here...read at your own risk!

Question 1: About the Twilight movie:
"Hasn’t seen the entire thing.
Director is kind of a genius.
Actors fit roles really well.
Ad no, I can’t say things about Breaking Dawn."

Question 2: Is it (Breaking Dawn) the last book?
"Only from Bella’s point of view. I may go back and write other stories from other characters
points of view."

Question 3: Would you ever post outtakes about Jared and Melanie being reunited on your website?
"Interesting question. That is the one outtake that I probably would write. It is the one scene I see in my head and really happens. Only thing is when I’m on tour, I’m not writing and I’m on tour a lot."

I'll put up some more tomorrow. Ciao!

Sunday, May 18, 2008

One Chapter Left!

I finally got in over 1,000 words written today! I finished up Chapter 17 which is also the final action sequence of the book and I have one last chapter to write and then off to start editing. I can't believe how close I am to finishing it now.

And I'm still working on those Stephenie Meyer discussion videos. My computer is really being annoying.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Quick Update:

Okay, I just have to update quick because I am getting ready for my hubby's 30th surprise birthday party.

I went to the Thanksgiving Point Host signing with Stephenie Meyer. She is so incredibly cool up close. Even though she talked to my little brother more while she signed my books! Well, I made him come to a Twilight Mom's party afterward...so we were even. But as soon as my computer doesn't call the video I got from the signing a "virus" I'll post it here.

I have to go now! Ciao!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Finally Writing Again!

So, I finally sat down tonight and started to work on my final action sequence of my story. It's coming along pretty well if not for the fact that I keep detouring myself into different directions.

I'm aiming to have it done tonight. So, wish me luck! If this sequence gets finished tonight, then I will be one more chapter to go to really finish the first draft!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Sick and not fun to be either!

I'm almost finished with The Host by Stephenie Meyer and I just can't say enough wonderful things about it.

My little girl has a fever of 101 though and I am not going to work tomorrow. That will hopefully give me some time to work on my book and hopefully almost finish it up. Also to hopefully catch up on my Ghosthunters and Supernatural episodes!

Anyway, this is a short one today because of so many busy things happening.

Oh, before I go, I finally learned how to play Guitar Hero today. I'm sadly not very good at it.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Almost Here!

This Friday is almost here. I thought last Tuesday was the coolest day of the year so far when The Host by Stephenie Meyer was released along with ticket sales for her signing, the movie: P.S. I Love You with Gerard Butler and Hillary Swank, and the Josh Groban Awake Tour DVD being released. But as I think about it more and more, I can't get it through my head that I am going to meet one of my absolutely favorite authors up close on Friday. What will I say? I don't want to be a redundant person saying, "You are the coolest in the world." "Thanks for saving my life with Bella and Edward." "You have the God given talent to tell stories." I just can't say all those things. I guess I will have to think about it more before then.

I'm also trying to think of questions that I can submit to be part of the discussion that is focused on The Host at the signing. Right now, all I can think of is "Do you watch any Stargate? I just saw a lot of Stargate in the story."

Oh, and update on my story. I have written 540 more words this weekend to up my collected word total to be 72,330 words! I still have to finish this chapter then write the final chapter and I'm completely finished with the first book of the The Sunset Heir trilogy. And I'm working on finishing up my outline for Lovely Dreams since my main character likes to tell me the story BACKWARDS!

Well, that's it for today. I so cannot wait until Friday! I will post the pictures and video I get from the signing/discussion Sunday or Monday next week. Ciao!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Awake Tour DVD

So, today has been so magnificently AWESOME! Me and my group that went to the Josh Groban concert back in August are shown on the tour DVD! It's just surreal to be able to see yourself on something other than a home video.

In other news of my life...still have 2 chapters to write for The Sunset Heir. For those of you who do not know what this story is about, well, I'll try my best at a summary (will be good writing exercise).

The Sunset Heir is a story about Catherine Mae Jameson (aka Cat to some people). She is the only child of Elizabeth Jameson and has been raised on a strict curfew schedule, but now has graduated from high school and eighteen years old heading off to Florence, Italy with her best friend, Lisa Grant. Although, before she leaves her small town of New Salem, MA she sees her mom talking with a strange young man in the backyard, and a slimy long haired creep showing up at her graduation party. Once in Florence, she meets Tobias, Hannah, and Carson who seem to have a great deal of worry in keeping Catherine safe from the Night-Dwellers (vampires who can only be out at night). However, she also receives an amulet of protection from her mom and falls in love with Carson and he feels the same way; even though he is her bodyguard it is difficult for the two to keep their emotions stoic from each other and dispense of their love for one another. Will Catherine be able to choose between her love for Carson and give up the power she receives from the amulet or choose her destiny and leave Carson forever, never being able to see him again?

Okay, that summary stunk! But it gets the main storyline out there.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Mother's Day Update:

Okay, it's up now! Just go to http://www.utahbabyguide.com/ and then click on the May edition of the online magazine and go to page 18 once it is uploaded. The story is there.

In all honesty, I really think that it is so strange to see my work in print, but it's also so exciting at the same time. I can't wait for the day now to see how my novel will look printed and bound once I can get it finished, edited, and then out to agents and publishers. That day will come soon, but now with this publication, I'm so excited for my novel to get finished. My writer's block is gone, but now life has gotten in the way. I really hope to finish it soon.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Mother's Day

Sorry all...I had to delete this little story because it's going into a magazine. I will post the link for the magazine when it is up and ready to go.

Monday, April 21, 2008

Back to Work

Well, I'm back at work now today and I was just hanging around--nothing to do--and my main character spoke! She actually spoke to me. I was so excited, I couldn't believe that now my writer's block has officially dissipated. I wrote around 600 words on Saturday night, then stayed up watching my husband play World of Warcraft until one on Sunday night, but now the house is quiet, so I will go and write. My story is almost complete with the first draft, and then...editing! Well, here's to no more writer's block, somehow, I think though that me at work really did trigger something. Maybe my characters got bored too...

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Writer's Block...Any way of getting over it?

Okay, so I've now had writer's block for two solid months. I lied, sorry, I did write a total of maybe 300 words or so last month. So, not really a total block, but a big one. I've really decided to kind of get out of that by writing about writer's block and how different things help me deal with it and how I've come out of it.

As a writer, some days are better than others. A lot of writer's really say, "write, write, write" and if you get a block, just keep on writing. Well, I've tried that and it just doesn't cut it for me. For some, yes, it may work for you, but everyone is different. Even writer's just follow the flow of their own rules that fit their lifestyle.

So, you are sitting either at your computer, laptop, or have a pen in hand and nothing on the page. What do you do? The answer seems so simple and easy sometimes, but when you try it, it just doesn't help.

Working on a story is tough. A lot of people who aren't writer's don't know this. However, I know readers know this as well. People who read like the complexity of the characters and the intermingled plots, both emotional and physical to and with the main character. Well, for a writer, this complexity is just the beginning of getting blocks.

A lot of people think we are crazy. Yes, I will raise my hand in the air and admit I talk to people who don't exist, but that is when you know you can write and are a writer. But just talking to imaginary characters helps a little.

There are a few things I do that help me with writer's block...or more of "mind block".

1) I listen to music that fits the mood of the scene I'm writing. Hey, it's worth a shot to kick in some needed inspiration. So, if you're writing an action scene, you may be listening to some Linkin Park, Nightwish, or Within Temptation's "The Howling". Other scenes may be romantic, so Josh Groban, Michael Buble, or Celine Dion falls into the playlist. These things help! Just the mood of the music and imagining the scene falling into place each and every moment and movement of the character's can help get you out of a block.

2) Rereading. Some authors don't reread their written things until they are ready to edit. I like to reread the previous moments to catch up on what I've been trying to come across in emotion and imagery.

3) Watching movies, or favorite television shows. I know, sounds strange; nevertheless, it works. Watching anything that helps you with your story or that scene, can inspire you. Who hasn't been inspired to live for the moment from "The Ultimate Gift" or to be a great hero like Bruce Willis in "Die Hard"? Even watching sitcoms helps with dialogue. Maybe you have a character that is like Phoebe from "Friends". Just her witty banter and blonde pervasiveness can really help boost some comedic dialogue into your story.

4) This is the killer one. Just edit. Editing some of your story will get you back into the flow of things. I've heard so many things about editing it's not funny. I've heard, "Don't edit until you're finished", and "Editing is good for you", and "Get rid of your inner editor". Well, that inner editor can leave while you are writing. That's the good thing about getting rid of your inner editor, but when you're in a block, editing is a hard thing to do, but worth it in the end. You will reread things over that you have forgotten and then something sparks in your mind creating an electrical pulse that sends inspiration for that one scene that you don't know how to fix.

5) Final one. Just write. It's a toughy, this one. Yes, I know I mentioned it hasn't worked for me. Although, my story has moved along faster than if I hadn't written a word with a block on my mind. I've gotten the essentials down and will be editing a lot of work later on. I really don't like to write when I have a block, but just writing can get those infernal ideas or scenes out of your mind and you won't have to worry about them until you decide to edit.

Now, there are the things I do to get rid of my block. And no, posting on my new blog doesn't count! I'm writing aren't I? I'm just not writing my story. Well, I hope some things have helped you, if not, I'm sorry. I know these things help me out when I'm stuck and I know others that use these things.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The Game

Well, first of all, I now have a blog! Wow! I didn't think I would ever have one and here it is. So, to get to the cool stuff...at least I think it's cool. I like to write and have an obsession over Stephenie Meyer's Twilight Saga and cannot wait for The Host to come out. But the only things I really like to write are my own stories. I'll post snippets here and there when I remember too or if I think I want to share it with the world.

I wrote this fanfic though and I really don't do fanfics, so any fanfic authors/readers reading this, I'm sorry. I am not a good writer for this kind of stuff.

Mostly this fanfic is about how Bella Swan's mother, Renee spent her Valentine's Day in Florida. It kind of comes from New Moon. I thought of this little story when I remembered how Jacob gave Bella the small box of candy hearts for Valentine's. However, Edward does get mentioned, so I have no idea when this would be set for that matter. It is all just theoretical, and remember, I don't do fanfics. This will probably ever be my only one, so enjoy.

The Game

Cleaning the house was not my idea of how I wanted to spend Valentine’s Day. In fact, it wasn’t even close. I had so much to do today and Phil hadn’t even told me what plans, if any, he has made for us. We go out a lot together, we really do, but Valentine’s is a day where I want to really feel loved. Being left to clean the house all day while Phil was coaching; wasn’t my idea of feeling loved at all.
I dipped the mop back into the bucket that was filled to the rim with dirt. “Why can’t he just wipe his feet when he comes in after practice?” I kept asking myself. It felt like I had a child in my home again. I finished mopping the kitchen floor and started working on the dishes that had been left in the sink for about a week now. I sighed as I stared out the window.
The forecast had called for rain today, but it was clear out this afternoon. That was a plus. At least I could get out on my bike after I cleaned up the place. I couldn’t think of a better thing to do than that. With that in mind, I quickly finished the dishes and changed my clothes into more appropriate attire for biking.
“Ahh…” I breathed in the air. It was refreshing to get outside. At least it was cooler right now than it would be in the summer. Sure I was used to the Florida weather now, but I still didn’t like all the bugs that came with the sticky humidity. Climbing on to the bike, I began pedaling down the street.
The world was in love today, and I could definitely see it. There were couples walking along the beach hand in hand. From where I was, I could see how much they were in love. It made me depressed since I hadn’t even gotten flowers yet.
“Maybe he forgot,” I told myself. I rode down toward the school Phil coached at. I stopped in front of the school and just sat on my bike arguing with myself if I should go in and find him to surprise him, or just wait. After a few minutes, I decided I would go inside. I locked up the bike and just made my way in. I waved at the front office receptionist, and continued on down the hall toward the gym. I hoped that Phil didn’t have the boys out practicing in the field yet.
Before going inside, I ran my fingers through my hair to make it look like a helmet hadn’t been on my head. Grabbing the latch to the gym door, I opened it up. The only person I could see wasn’t Phil. It was the janitor.
“Um, hi,” I called out to him. I waved my hand in his direction to get his attention. He looked up from his sweeping and came over to me. He was a very tall, thin man. His bald head was as shiny as the floor. Maybe he uses the same polisher for his head as he does for the gym floor, I thought. He actually almost looked more like a string bean than anything else.
“Yeah, can I help you?” he seemed disgruntled at me for interrupting his work.
“I was just wondering if there was baseball practice going on today,” I told him.
“What’s it to you?” his grey eyes poured into me. “You a kids mom or something?”
“Uh, no,” I told him firmly, “I’m actually the coach’s wife.”
He creased his forehead and scratched his bald head. “You Phil’s wife, Renee?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Oh, he didn’t tell you?” his attitude toward me changed quickly.
“What didn’t he tell me?” Phil was going to hear about from me for skipping out on one of the greatest days of the year for something else.
“They had a preseason tournament today. They won’t be back until late,” the janitor just kept staring at me. “Are you okay?”
I let out a slow, deep breath. Phil didn’t tell me about any tournament. I know he loved baseball, but I never really figured that he loved it more than he loved me. I moved over to the bleachers and sat down. The janitor came over and sat next to me. He began patting my back as I put my head in my hands and began to cry. I felt really embarrassed to be crying in front of some man I didn’t know, but I couldn’t help it. I was just an emotional person.
“I can’t believe he wouldn’t tell me about the tournament,” I told the janitor. “It’s the one day out of the year that I love being in love. Then he has to go out to a tournament without even calling.”
“Can I tell you something?” the janitor questioned. I just shrugged my shoulders.
“This will be the tenth year that I have been alone on Valentine’s Day. You see, I lost my wife to cancer ten years ago to this day. It is very hard for me every year, but I know that I love her still and that she is in heaven loving me. You should be happy and feel loved everyday, no matter what. You never know when you will lose that person you love,” he looked at me knowingly.
“I’m sorry about that,” I responded solemnly. I tried to imagine my life without Phil, and it felt like my life wouldn’t be whole again. I guess I would probably go back to Arizona and teach again, but I was extremely happy here. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else without him beside me.
“You know, Phil brags about how pretty you are everyday,” he smiled. It made me smile to know that Phil did something like bragging about me to the people he worked with. I felt special. “He wasn’t lying, but he didn’t do you enough justice.”
“What does he say?” I was happy he bragged about me, but I hoped that he hadn’t said something that would make me turn out to be some weird person.
“Well,” the janitor started, “nothing is bad. He did say you were an emotional person, but just that he loved your ever-changing moods. He believes that it keeps you young and fresh. Phil also mentioned about how strong of a woman you are in letting your only daughter move up to Washington to live with her father and you hardly get to see her.”
“I do email her though,” I retorted. The janitor just laughed at that. I decidedly got up to leave. If Phil was going to be home late, then I guessed I should go home. There was really nothing left I could do outside the house without becoming even more depressed. “Thank you for talking with me. And I really hope you have a good day.”
The janitor just nodded and smiled at me, “I will. You have a good day too.” With that, he stood up and started sweeping the floor again where he had left off. I waved goodbye as I left the gym.
The ride home was worse than the ride there. There were more people out and about. It made me sick to think that Phil just wouldn’t have told me about the tournament. But as I pulled into the driveway, I saw his car there. I quickly parked my bike and ran inside. When I got inside, I just stood there in awe.
Phil wasn’t dressed in his baseball coaching gear. It was in fact, the complete opposite. He was wearing a black tuxedo with tails on the jacket and complete with a bowtie and cummerbund.
“Don’t you look nice,” I stated. I had never seen him so dressed up. He looked really good.
“It’s the tails right? They make me look more like a penguin,” he joked.
“You really do look nice, and the tails just add to that,” I replied.
He came quickly over to me and hugged me. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” he whispered in my ear. Pulling away, I just checked him out once more.
“This is a surprise,” I was really dumbfounded.
“It was supposed to be,” he chuckled. “Tony, the janitor,” he added when he saw my look of confusion as to who Tony was, “did an awesome job for me by keeping you at the school. I was there when you got there, but I ended practice early just so I could surprise you for today. I know how much you love this day.”
I couldn’t help but smile. “So, what are the plans since you are all dressed up like that.”
“You go change first,” he told me turning me toward the bedroom. “I brought home a dress for you. Bella told me what color would be best.” I excitedly went to the bedroom to find a navy blue dress lying across the bed. It had spaghetti straps and a series of straps criss-crossing in the back.
Phil entered the room as I admired the dress he had picked out for me. He wrapped his arms around me from behind. “You like it?” he kissed me on the cheek.
I nodded. “Do I have time for a shower?” I didn’t want to go out smelling like cleaner and sweat. It would make for a nasty perfume smell, and since it was apparent that we were going somewhere fancy, I didn’t want people to be repelled by my smell.
“Yeah, you do. You have plenty of time,” he laughed.
I ran into the bathroom and started up the shower. In about fifteen minutes I was showered and dressed, and working on my hair. Phil waited patiently the entire time I got ready. He would comment on things, and updated me about the baseball team. He mentioned at what point that the team had helped him plan this night out for us. I looked at him with worry.
“No, no, it won’t be bad. I told them that I would make sure they didn’t play if tonight didn’t go right,” he told me calming me down a little. “You ready then?”
I checked over everything to make sure I looked fine and finally made the decision that I was okay. With that, Phil and I went outside and to my surprise he had rented a really nice sports car. Okay, where did the money come from? Oh well, I knew I wouldn’t mind until tomorrow when we had to go back to our regular lives, and have to work harder to pay off the credit card bill that was built up on this night.
“Wow, I’m surprised you aren’t freaking out about this so far,” Phil commented as he helped me into the car. “I’m glad.”
He got in and started up the car. As we drove to our destination, I thought about what the janitor told me about loving everyday. I didn’t have the immediate fear that I would lose Phil right away, but I knew someday that he would be gone or I would be gone. I didn’t care anymore about anything today except for the two of us being able to have found each other and be happy.
We finally pulled into a parking lot. Of course, I thought to myself. He had brought me to the Miami Dolphins stadium. He had to mix baseball with this fancy dress. Anything to keep baseball close, I concluded.
“I think we’re a bit overdressed for a baseball game,” I joked with him. He just grinned at me.
“There isn’t a game today.” He got out of the car and came over to help me out. “In fact, this is where we’re supposed to be.”
“Alright then,” I just stared at the stadium.
He wrapped his hand in mine and we walked inside the stadium. As we entered, I watched as the stadium stayed dark except for the emergency lights that lit up the way. Phil waved his free hand in a certain direction and the only lights that came on were down on the infield. He took me straight there excitedly.
“Since today is packed in every other restaurant, I decided—with the help of the team—to create our own restaurant setting,” he told me as we approached the pitcher’s mound. There stood a small table set with a dozen roses on the table with my name on a card in them. Two places were set on the table for us. Phil pulled out one of the chairs, and I graciously took my seat. The tablecloth was white while the plates were a very nice china. Phil took his seat across from me. He motioned for drinks. A couple of the boys from his team, Ben and Jeremy came out. I noticed that the boys were wearing tuxedos like Phil. Ben was pushing the cart with our appetizers and the champagne. Jeremy took the champagne from the cart and popped it open and poured it into our glasses.
Setting the champagne in the bucket next to the table, he bowed and left with a smile. I couldn’t help but smile in return. Ben then put our plates in front of us. But instead of an appetizer on my plate, there was a black velvet box lying on it.
“You have overdone yourself now,” I told Phil as I opened the box in front of me. Inside it was a pearl necklace with matching earrings. I could tell he was pleased as I gasped at how beautiful they were. He promptly got out of his seat and helped me put them on.
He returned to his seat and shared what appetizer he had on his plate with me. Right before we finished the appetizer, music was turned on across the entire stadium. It was jazz and it just filled the crisp, beautiful night with a happy feeling. Ben and Jeremy returned and exchanged our plates with our main dish. Pesto Cheese with Ravioli and Chicken, baked potato, and assorted vegetables.
By dessert, I kind of started wondering if I should ask how he or actually, we, could afford all this. I finished my raspberry torte and asked.
“Well,” he started, “I really just wanted to keep it a secret. I figured it would spoil all the mystery if I told you how it worked. But if you really want to know, Jeremy’s dad is an assistant to the owner of the Dolphins. He arranged for us to use it tonight. Ben and Jeremy volunteered to be our waiter and maitre’d for the evening.” He paused for a moment, possibly trying to figure out the best way to explain everything else.
He went on, “I did call Bella. She said that the only thing she knew was the color for the dress. You know how she is not wanting to get into these kind of things. But she had me talk to her boyfriend, Edward. He helped out a lot. In fact, his dad paid for the rental car we drove in, but I picked out the jewelry and the food for tonight.” He cracked a smile probably hoping I wouldn’t be angry for borrowing money from other people. But I wasn’t mad at all actually, in fact, I believed that this made up for the entire day of not feeling loved and being led by a janitor that told me things that would affect me the rest of my life.
“Thank you for this beautiful night,” I smiled at him. “It was absolutely perfect, I couldn’t imagine anything better.” I leaned across the table and kissed him lightly.
“I’m glad you like it,” he grinned. The rest of the night was perfect. Being the more simple person I usually was, I did have fun laughing with Phil about our days, and enjoying the fanciful evening. I told him what Tony had told me, and Phil completely agreed to Tony’s philosophy. After we finished, we headed home and finished the night out with cuddling up to one of my favorite movies.
“You know Phil,” I started, “this day was horrible at the beginning, but it ended up being one of the most perfect days in my life.”
He kissed me on the head, “I’m happy it turned out that way. This has been so perfect just being able to be with you. You make my life fulfilled.”